After suffering a brain aneurysm in 2016, I closed down my website and wrote my last blog. It was time for me to take a healing journey. It needed to be intimate, just God and me. As I sit here nestled on my back porch with an odd summer breeze falling upon my skin, I reflect. A lot has happened since that last blog, including a name change. In the past three years, I fought to recover from a brain aneurysm, or better stated; I surrendered to the journey of it all. I lost my step-dad of twenty-five years to cancer, followed by the tragic and shocking death of my mother, who died of a heart attack two months later. She was my wisdom, my angel, my scaffolding, and my best friend. A little over one month later, I found myself signing divorce papers for the second time in my life. 

Oddly enough, as I sit attempting my first blog after this long hiatus, a little butterfly has come to entertain me this evening. I have watched her flap her beautifully decorated wings and work quite diligently to steal my attention. I think she wants to be the center of attention, so I’m going to allow her the recognition. She has earned it. 

All butterflies must make their journey into the cocoon if they wish to fly. I had to make mine. It’s a valiant effort, and now that it’s time to practice flapping my wings, I will share with you what my time spent processing through the various stages of metamorphosis has taught me. 

Stage One: 

Butterflies experience stages of growth. The egg is the resting stage. Here you are almost invisible. Nobody can see your skills and gifts. You can’t see you either. Your eyesight is underdeveloped. You don’t know you can fly, but this is where you dream of all the things you might do or all the things you might potentially become in the future. This is when faith is born to believe for what you deem is impossible. This is also where you dream of a better life, a different reality than what you are experiencing inside your current shell. You may feel trapped, but your dreams are there to help liberate you. Keep believing. That hunch you have that there is something more is the light of truth. It will illuminate your darkness and carry you seamlessly to the next step of your journey. 

Stage Two: 

The larva stage is the growth stage. It’s where a lot of eating takes place so growth can happen. This is where we gather information, ponder ideas, conduct experiments, and experience a lot of trial and error in our lives. The getting it right and getting it wrong moments of your life are actually helping you grow. 

When the caterpillar comes out of the egg, it turns into an eating machine with the sole motive of eating and eating some more. It can even eat food in quantity greater than its body size. This is where we, as humans, will consume anything in our search to feed the soul. It’s also a place of limitation as the caterpillar is initially very small and must stay in its environment unable to move or travel to another tree for food. We overeat, we overmedicate, and we try to soothe ourselves from our place of restriction often feeling quite small. We begin to feel uncomfortable in our skin, feeling as if we are destined to be something more than what our current reality is telling us we are. 

The skin of a caterpillar does not have the capability to stretch and grow. During this stage, they shed their skin four or five times. Their skin becomes too tight and splits open, revealing a new, larger skin underneath. This repeat shedding of skin is how they grow. 

There are many layers to be removed before we finally get to the place of understanding who we truly are. With every layer that is shed, we are split wide open, leaving us incredibly vulnerable. Yet, it’s in this progress we begin to discover our worth and value more than ever before. We begin to feel lighter and freer with every layer of skin that is removed. We repeat this repetitive process of letting go of the old and embracing the new. We let go of ideas and concepts that are weighing us down. We shed mindsets, belief systems, and people that have attached themselves to us but that are not destined to remain for our next level of growth. Our soul is telling us that it wants to feel lighter now. It wants to be free. It wants to fly. We begin to identify what we have allowed to break us, and what we will no longer tolerate and no longer compromise. What must be shed? What must be released? What is no longer serving our highest and best good. What weights must be lifted so that we can rise? These are the questions that consume the mind in this phase of our metamorphosis. 

Stage 3: Once the caterpillar has grown and taken its maximum size and weight, it transforms itself into a pupa also known as a chrysalis. The caterpillar has now gained the strength, determination, and will power to change and transform itself. Inside the pupa, a lot of changes take place which are mandatory for the caterpillar to transform into a grown up or adult butterfly. 

When you are a caterpillar, you don’t have wings to fly, because you haven’t grown them yet. You haven’t finished your necessary stages of development. The chrysalis stage is where you grow your wings. This is when the body parts face massive transformation. In this metamorphosis stage, the caterpillar get all the beautiful parts of being a butterfly. During this time, a hardened case also forms around the pupa to protect it from predators and extreme weather conditions. 

When an intricate work needs to be done in your life, often times you are hidden away in the secret place. You are hemmed in by the Divine. You are covered and protected so this profound work of soul transformation can be undergone. Nature shows us how when an animal needs to undergo a serious transformation, it will isolate itself until this process is complete. 

If you find yourself in this protective pupa stage of life, things may be a little confusing. You’re not quite what you use to be but you’re not yet what you know you are destined to be either. Sometimes you feel a little of your former self and sometimes you feel brand new. This is the in-between phase. You flip back and forth often behaving like a caterpillar and yet starting to take on the characteristics of a butterfly. During this phase you should protect yourself from negative influences and keep your focus on the process of transformation. 

Richard Bach once said, “What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly.” When you think your life is over because of various circumstances that may have presented themselves to you, for the butterfly this is just the beginning of a more beautiful stage of  life. See the good in your situation. Every dark cloud has a silver lining. No matter how bleak the situation is, it holds the promise of something better. While in the cocoon of life, be persistent. You will find a way out. When you face adversity, believe you will emerge stronger in time. Anything that does not kill you, makes you stronger. 

Given time and the proper nourishment, you will begin to look more like a butterfly. You start to take on your new identity even before all the parts and pieces emerge. You feel like a butterfly long before you ever gain your wings to fly. This is the secret to your transformation. You begin to notice now that you look different and feel different, because you are different. 

Everyone is destined to emerge from their chrysalis of darkness. We enter as one person and come forth as another. We grow wings and as we learn to stretch them, we begin to eventually break down the restricted barriers of our cocoon allowing us to break free. 

Stage 4: 

10 Lessons from the Emerged Butterfly 

  1. When the butterfly emerges out of the pupa, it has to undergo a period of rest before it can take flight. Its wings are folded in an inward fashion towards its body, and they are very soft to touch. It takes time for the wings of a butterfly to gain their own shape. It takes time for you to gain yours. 

When the butterfly emerges, it needs time to rest so it can gain the strength needed to pump blood into its wings. The pumping of blood to the wings gets the butterfly ready to make its first flight and opens up their wings so that they can work and flap properly. 

After a massive life transformation of any kind, take time to rest and assimilate what has happened to you. Don’t be so quick to take flight. Give yourself time to allow the blood to flow to your wings. Give yourself time to allow your life force to return. You’ve been giving all your energy towards massive growth during a season of intense metamorphosis. Butterflies rest for hours before attempting their first flight. Learn from the greatest creatures to ever show us complete 100% transformation. Take time for the blood to return to your frame. Some of us have had the life force knocked completely out of us. We’ve been hit hard. We’ve been drained. Don’t rush to reenter the world that broke you down. Make sure you are ready to emerge with a new identity so you can tackle your future from a mindset that is soaring and no longer crawling upon the ground. Learning to fly takes practice. Give yourself sufficient time and compassion as you practice how to use your wings. 

  1. Once the butterfly starts its flight, it searches for a partner with whom it can mate and bring more new butterflies into this world. Word to the wise: don’t look for a partner until your metamorphosis is complete. You don’t know what you want until you know and understand who you are. Butterflies wait till their transformation is complete before searching for their perfect match to multiple themselves into this world. I wonder if we waited until we were whole emotionally, how many relationships would stay afloat instead of capsize. I think there are some significant lessons there for us as demonstrated from the butterfly. I am personally taking notes. 

  2. Butterflies are only capable of sucking nectar and not eating anything. Their mouthparts only have the capability of drinking using their proboscis. For the rest of their lives, butterflies are incredibly particular about what they put in their mouths. 

Once you’ve been through your transformation, you won’t settle for ingesting things that are beneath you. You’ll be particular about what you allow into your space. Keep it pure. Keep it sweet. 

  1. Butterflies have transparent wings. Butterflies have scales on their wings, which are capable of reflecting light and thus reflecting different color hues. Below the scales, there is a layer of chitin which is so delicate and thin that you can easily see through it giving it a transparent approach. When a butterfly turns old, the scales fall down from the wings thus exposing the layers of chitin which is actually transparent in nature. 

When you emerge from your cocoon, it’s actually your transparency and authentic nature that will cause you to reflect light into the world. Shedding all those layers of false identities and false beliefs about yourself help you to appreciate and love your perfectly imperfect self. Your transparency is what makes you colorful to the world around you. It’s what makes others marvel and enjoy watching you fly. And just like the scales fall down exposing the true nature of the butterfly at its most mature age, the older you get the more your experiences will allow for your true transparent nature to come shining through. 

  1. When the butterfly emerges out of the pupa state, its mouth comes in two parts thus, it is their first job to assemble their mouth part before they land into trouble. 

If you want to be a butterfly, you must have learned to master your tongue. You speak kindly to yourself, you speak kindly to others, and you speak kindly towards your future. You speak life. If your mouth is not assembled correctly, you won’t be able to get your proper nourishment, and you will die. 

  1. Cold temperatures cause hindrances for butterflies to fly. Butterflies cannot regulate their body temperatures as they are cold-blooded insects. Thus the outside temperature has a drastic effect on them and their ability to fly. Butterflies are always in search of sunlight. 

Butterflies can fly up to thirty miles an hour and up to fifty miles in one day. A monarch butterfly will fly over two thousand miles from Canada to Mexico in the fall just so it can stay warm. There is no distance too great for a butterfly to travel when it comes to securing a warm environment where it can thrive. We should be prepared to do the same. 

Your environment is going to affect you. It’s everything. If the conditions aren’t right, it could hinder your ability to fly. Remove yourself from cold-hearted environments that make you shiver. Place yourself in the sunlight among other butterflies who are also seeking to bask in the sunlight. Keep it positive. Build an atmosphere of warmth and vitality, and get rid of anyone that leaves you shivering in the darkness. You are destined to fly. Anything that hinders that must go. Your survival depends upon it. 

  1. Butterflies have a short life span. They can only survive for a couple of weeks. Once you’ve had your metamorphosis and are soaring, recognize the profound journey it has taken for you to arrive at this place. Respect that. Savor it. Appreciate it. Life is short. Don’t take it for granted. Make it sweet. Make it meaningful. Make it count. 

  2. Butterflies have a short eyesight. They have a good vision for a distance up to ten to twelve feet, but beyond this, they face problems, and their sight gets vague and blurry. 

Butterflies don’t need to see too far into their future, because they are present relishing and savoring what is right in front of them. Let your present moment illuminate your path. There is a reason the eyes of a butterfly get blurry when they look too far ahead of them. Let’s learn from those who have transformed into the highest version of all they were intended to be. 

  1. Butterflies don’t just live on nectar. They also consume water from mud puddles. Sugar is not the only requirement that a butterfly needs. It also requires minerals and salts. Thus they drink water from mud puddles to satisfy their needs for these essential minerals and salts. 

Just because you’re a butterfly, does’t mean you won’t experience some mud puddles during the remainder of your journey. Learn to utilize them to supply you with the minerals you need. Let them make you salty. You are the salt of the earth. Who knew your life’s “mud puddles” could provide so much nourishment? Allow every experience, especially the muddy ones, to feed you and make your wings stronger. 

  1. Butterflies are wise enough to save themselves from falling as prey. They will use camouflage to adhere to their surroundings and stay still so that the other insects cannot identify that a butterfly is there trying to save its life. 

Know how to protect yourself from those who want to prey on you. Protect your mind. Protect your energy. Establish and root your thoughts in life-giving affirmations that remind you of truth. Be smart around your predators. Out wit them. How does the butterfly do this? It gets still. In the midst of chaos, keep stillness inside of you. In the stillness, we find protection from life’s predators. 

Lastly….. Some butterflies may take an entire year to complete the whole process of transformation, whereas some may finish it in a short span of just one month. Everyone is developing at different stages in their process of metamorphosis. Don’t forget that when you’re sipping nectar and fluttering high above the caterpillars still gorging themselves on the green, leafy vegetation below. True butterflies have compassion for those still inside their cocoons. 

We are all butterflies. The greatness lying within you will bloom in time. You are destined to fly. Today a caterpillar, tomorrow a butterfly. You just have to come to the point of wanting to fly so badly that you are willing to give up the life of caterpillar. Your intense longing to grow is the first step towards your metamorphosis. 

Life is like a butterfly. You will grow through changes before becoming something beautiful. No stage is permanent. The struggle you are in today is developing the strength you need for tomorrow. Do not give up. The struggle is worth it. As Bob Dylan said, “Behind every beautiful thing, there is some kind of pain.” 

Like the butterfly evolving, learn to love and embrace each stage of your journey. Don’t judge yourself harshly. You are becoming a butterfly, and one day when you are soaring high above the world below, you will look down and appreciate the path it took for you to earn your wings. Your destination isn’t the only thing that’s beautiful. The journey itself is laced in splendor. It’s remarkable actually. Be proud of that. We marvel at the butterfly not just because of its beauty, but because the transformation it endured to obtain it. 

Everything in life is a vehicle for transformation. Utilize it. See each step of your metamorphosis as valuable to the overall outcome. Don’t settle for being a caterpillar when you are meant to fly. 

You are destined for higher things. 

To the tadpole, you are going to jump leaps and bounds. To the ugly ducking, you are growing into a breathtakingly, beautiful swan full of majestic grace. To the molting eagle with withering feathers, beaks, and claws, you are going to live longer, be stronger, and fly higher than ever before. To the baby growing and developing inside the womb, you are going to be a world changer. And to the caterpillar, you are destined to fly.